Have you ever walked into an Indian club?
No. There are no super models who have a naughty smile on their face every time you look at them.
No. There are no men, who come up to you to make interesting conversation.
No. You will not find the "one" there.
No. Not everyone is not going to love what you are wearing.
No. This is not going to be the night of your life.
Chances are.
You will be bored.
You will want to shoot the drunk friend who can't stop talking.
You won't be able to shut him/her up over the LOUD music. Infact, it will be tough to hear your own thoughts over that level of sound.
And you will have to hold something in your hand. A smoke. A drink. A girl. A phone. Try standing in a club without any of these and you will feel like we have stripped off your clothes. Do try it next time and feel your self esteem get lowered.
Chances are you will find such characters:
Garba Girls: a bunch of girls who keep their bags in the middle and dance in a circle. Sometimes the steps seem to be predetermined.
The poser couple: A couple who will stand close to each other and look everywhere except into each other's eyes.
The Dancer: A girl or a guy, who thinks their audition for "You think you can dance" is happening right there.(Yes.They will mostly hurt you when they are dancing and you will feel like hitting them back.)
The Creep: A guy who holds his beer and stands towards the edge of the bar. You know he's not with anyone and so does he.
The photo uploaders: The girls who love to pose for pictures every two seconds so that they can subtly boast about what a great time they had. By the way, you find these pictures everywhere on Facebook. Its the same pose. The same smiles. The same drunk eyes.
The Aunties: The kitty party now makes its way to the club. These are forty somethings who hold cocktails and smile to show they are enjoying themselves. If we are lucky we catch them sometimes grooving to " My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard".
The Kids: The trendy super models with braces. Their stilettos are more expensive than your entire outfit. Their behavior louder than the music. Usually seen with boys who have just hit puberty with ill fitting clothes and facial hair equivalent to a girl who hasn't threaded her upper lip area for 2 months.
And finally,
Us: The ones who watch all this and think "what the hell is wrong with them".
The ones who fail to realise that that's what everyone in that club is thinking.
No. There are no super models who have a naughty smile on their face every time you look at them.
No. There are no men, who come up to you to make interesting conversation.
No. You will not find the "one" there.
No. Not everyone is not going to love what you are wearing.
No. This is not going to be the night of your life.
Chances are.
You will be bored.
You will want to shoot the drunk friend who can't stop talking.
You won't be able to shut him/her up over the LOUD music. Infact, it will be tough to hear your own thoughts over that level of sound.
And you will have to hold something in your hand. A smoke. A drink. A girl. A phone. Try standing in a club without any of these and you will feel like we have stripped off your clothes. Do try it next time and feel your self esteem get lowered.
Chances are you will find such characters:
Garba Girls: a bunch of girls who keep their bags in the middle and dance in a circle. Sometimes the steps seem to be predetermined.
The poser couple: A couple who will stand close to each other and look everywhere except into each other's eyes.
The Dancer: A girl or a guy, who thinks their audition for "You think you can dance" is happening right there.(Yes.They will mostly hurt you when they are dancing and you will feel like hitting them back.)
The Creep: A guy who holds his beer and stands towards the edge of the bar. You know he's not with anyone and so does he.
The photo uploaders: The girls who love to pose for pictures every two seconds so that they can subtly boast about what a great time they had. By the way, you find these pictures everywhere on Facebook. Its the same pose. The same smiles. The same drunk eyes.
The Aunties: The kitty party now makes its way to the club. These are forty somethings who hold cocktails and smile to show they are enjoying themselves. If we are lucky we catch them sometimes grooving to " My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard".
The Kids: The trendy super models with braces. Their stilettos are more expensive than your entire outfit. Their behavior louder than the music. Usually seen with boys who have just hit puberty with ill fitting clothes and facial hair equivalent to a girl who hasn't threaded her upper lip area for 2 months.
And finally,
Us: The ones who watch all this and think "what the hell is wrong with them".
The ones who fail to realise that that's what everyone in that club is thinking.
You are sure living up to the tagline of your blog :)
ReplyDeleteHave never been to a club (thank God!) but I suppose to each his own.....
haha love it ! reminds me of a night I went to HYPE ( the one and only time) . It was a saturday and there were all of the above types there !
ReplyDeleteThe Garba gang(s) ... (yes there were multiple)included guys too ! Ughhh ! What a night !
hahah i live in Singapore, and the nightlife here is comparatively better i guess (??) Okay you won't find any aunties here, but the garba girls are universal! lol
ReplyDeleteWell, let me say one thing that the Indian night life isn't too bad at all. Honestly, you can find at least one of such characters at any club around the world. Makes the clubbing experience much more interesting.
ReplyDelete